Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
