Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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