She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
The ass gains better be worth it
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