if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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