Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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