I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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