There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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