im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
