You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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