Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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