I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, howβs your day going??
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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