How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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