you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
