Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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