btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
My vagina just recognized that song.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
