I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
