My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
