hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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