5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
