i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
