Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
