there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
