And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
