strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."