no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
