I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
