I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
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