just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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