Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
