Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I fill condoms, not promises.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I currently don't understand fingers.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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