he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize