I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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