you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize