Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
