My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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