God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I just want to make out with him forever
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize