fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
