We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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