i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
No subtext here. People are naked.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
