i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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