Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize