Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize