i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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