They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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