This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
