I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
