If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
