i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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