She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
