Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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